The Shell Game
by waterlilylf
Summary: At their first meeting in the desert, and on the cusp of becoming friends, the young Quatre and Duo reveal a little of what's on their minds and in their hearts. Yaoi. 3 4 with a glimmer of 1 2


Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Gundam Wing, and make no profit from writing.

Note: This takes place chapter 11 of the series, after Quatre takes Duo to the Maguanacs' base in the desert. It can either be read as a one-shot, or as a story in the ALG universe, set after 'Rainbows.'

Many thanks to KS for beta-reading, and for ongoing moral support. Now, we need an acorn story, right?

**The Shell Game:**

Scanning the email, Quatre's face broke into a broad smile. He'd known Trowa was alive, naturally, but it was still wonderful to hear from him. And Duo was going to be so happy. He hadn't mentioned Heero at all; just that one brief comment about how he was feeling 'emotionally drained' after 01's attempted self-destruction, but Quatre had felt the anguish radiating from him.

Quatre quickly tapped out a short message, hoping Trowa was still on line. It had hurt, watching him fly away from the battlefield, away from Quatre. He'd been reproaching himself for the fact that he'd felt almost jealous of the other pilot, the one Tro had rescued. Stupid of him, but he'd wanted so badly for them to spend a little time together.

Duo was going to be so _happy_. That was the important thing.

When Quatre knocked on his door a few minutes later, Duo appeared anything but happy to have a visitor. After he'd put the gun away, and Quatre had collected the few items that had fallen off the tray he'd brought, they both just stood and gaped at each other.

He looked so tired, Quatre thought sorrowfully; so tired and sad and he obviously didn't trust anyone and the misery he'd felt at Heero's death was so painful.

'He isn't dead.' Quatre blurted it out too fast, and had to repeat it. 'I'm sorry,' he gabbled. 'I just got the message a few minutes ago; I came as soon as I heard.'

Duo's eyes narrowed sceptically. 'How the hell can you know that?'

'Trowa - 03 - sent me a message. Heero's wounded, but he's alive. He must be really strong, to have survived that.'

'He is, yeah,' Duo muttered. Quatre had expected a flare of joy, but there was nothing at all. Just a dull disbelief. 'You guys have some way to contact each other between missions? I thought we weren't supposed to do that.'

'I promise, it's safe.' Quatre replied, flushing slightly at Duo's comment. 'We use new email accounts, and it's all in code anyway. There's no way the messages can be traced. We'd never endanger each other! No one could track us here.'

'Right. That's kinda cool. Sorry, I wasn't dissing you or anything; it's just hard to believe. I was so damn sure he was dead. Where did he take Heero? Is it far from here?'

Quatre nibbled his bottom lip. It wasn't that he didn't trust Duo. He'd never have brought him here if he hadn't. But - he didn't know him well enough to trust with that sort of information. Not information that could possibly put Trowa in any sort of danger. 'It's a safe place,' he said finally, evasively. 'Nobody will find them. I'm sorry, I just think it's maybe better if no-one knows where they are. I promise though, Trowa will take wonderful care of him. Anyway, we can't leave right now, not in this sandstorm.'

Duo nodded sadly. 'It's OK. Why the hell _should _you trust me? You don't know me! He wouldn't want to see me anyway.' His chin jerked up suddenly, eyes catching sight of the tray Quatre had brought. 'Can I have some of that stuff?'

'Oh, please.' The blush deepened; he was already failing dismally in his duties as a host, not offering food. He just hadn't imagined that Duo would want to eat until he knew about Heero. 'Help yourself. I'm sorry; dinner should be in about an hour, but I thought you might be hungry. I didn't really know what you'd like, so I stole a little of everything from the kitchen.'

He grinned, suddenly. That had been fun, sneaking in and filling the tray without anyone seeing him. But he'd wanted to do it himself, not come to Duo with a trail of servants in his wake. Duo was _his _guest, besides and it was only fair that he look after him.

'Cheers.' Under Quatre's startled blue gaze, the other boy grabbed a small bowl of dates and tipped them down his throat. 'Hey, they're pretty good.' His eyes widened as he saw Quatre's expression. 'Shit. Am I not supposed to eat them like this?'

'Oh, no. It's fine.' Quatre blushed. He was being such a terrible host. Instead of making Duo feel welcome and relaxed, he seemed to be making him uncomfortable. 'I eat like that all the time.' He tilted a second bowl, containing slivered almonds, into his mouth and promptly choked.

It was almost worth it, though. By the time Duo had finished pounding his back, and Quatre had finished choking, they were grinning at each other.

'Sorry,' Duo said again, but he was smiling a real smile for once, and he could feel a little sparkle of happiness layered over his grief and worry for Heero. 'Where I come from, we don't have such fancy table manners. How come you have to steal food? Don't those guys feed you?'

'Oh! Yes, of course they do, but they like waiting on me. It gets rather irritating sometimes. I like doing things for myself.'

'And they treat you OK?' He posed the question casually enough, but there was one thought uppermost in his mind and it made Quatre choke and splutter again. 'They don't hurt you or anything?'

Oh, Allah. If Rashid ever knew what Duo thought about him and the other Maguanacs, he would die of embarrassment. Actually, Quatre himself was quite likely to expire from the same cause.

'It's not.. it's nothing like _that_!' he assured Duo hastily. 'They're my friends. Allies, really. They'd never hurt me.'

'That's OK, then,' Duo mumbled, mouth full of dried fruit. 'Sorry. I just thought…they're way older than you and you're pretty cute and…sorry. I guess that sort of thing doesn't happen where you come from.'

'It doesn't matter,' Quatre passed him a small plate of pastries, desperate to change the subject. He had no idea how to have a conversation like this. Duo actually thought he was cute and he'd said it straight out. Whatever did that mean? It was obvious how he felt about Heero, even if he was trying to hide it, so why was he noticing Quatre? No one had ever called him cute before! Oh dear. He _had _to start talking about something else.

'These are really good. You don't have to worry about your friend, you know. Trowa says he is badly injured, but he's going to be all right.'

'We're not friends,' Duo told him bleakly. 'Heero doesn't have time for anything like that. He's all about the mission. And he doesn't trust me anyway.'

_He loves you._

Quatre didn't say it. There was no way, really, to tell Duo without revealing what he could do, and that would almost certainly make the other boy think he was some sort of freak. But how could Duo not tell? Quatre had touched 01's mind as he self destructed, and it had been centred on Duo. Pain and regret and shining love.

It had hurt so much.

Besides, it wasn't easy to tell what 02 felt for Heero. It was hard to tell what he felt about _anything_. There was definite concern and attraction for the other pilot, and that terrible bleak emptiness when Duo had thought he was dead, but there were so many other layers of hurt and sorrow and bitterness and fear…

'Trowa's that guy who uses ammo like it's going out of fashion, right?' Duo's tongue snaked out to lick up a drop of honey and he grinned at Quatre. 'You're right. These are great!'

How could he _do _that? How in the world could he pretend to be so carefree when Quatre could feel all of those other emotions under the surface? And it had been … rather sexy, the way he'd licked his lips. No! He was not going to have those sorts of thoughts about Duo. Those thoughts belonged to Trowa.

'I'm afraid so.' Quatre shook his head at the lamentably accurate description. Trowa was a wonderful fighter, but he hadn't a clue about logistics or tactics. It just meant they were the perfect team, the way they complemented each other.

'I know Heero's tough, but he must have some pretty serious injuries. D'you know if 03 has any medical training?'

'Of course, he does! Well, I'm sure he does. He can do anything, I think. He's wonderful.'

'You guys are friends?' Duo asked, with just a hint of wistfulness.

Quatre took a deep breath. 'We're - ah - rather more than friends, actually.'

'You're gay?'

'I am, yes.' It was the first time he'd said it to another person, although he'd tried out the words in private. Nothing happened; he wasn't struck by lightning, or swallowed up by a sudden fissure in the earth.

Duo just shrugged. 'Whatever. None of my business, so long as you're not planning to jump on me. I'm warning you, I can look after myself so you better not try anything.'

'I wouldn't, ever…' Quatre stammered, feeling his face flame. 'Duo, I - I'm going to check on dinner.' He rushed out of the room as if Treize Khushrenada himself were after him, and took a series of deep breaths in the hallway.

Oh dear.

This was all going so horribly wrong. Everything he said managed to be wrong, somehow. He'd wanted so much for them to be friends, but Duo didn't even like him. Not that he could blame the other pilot, of course, Quatre amended hastily. He'd been an abysmal host, he'd made Duo uncomfortable, but he'd still felt only vague curiosity from Duo about him. But the other pilot apparently thought he was some sort of…of sexual predator.

How _awful_. Quatre gave himself a sidelong glance in one of the long mirrors than lined the hallway. He didn't look particularly fierce or dangerous. He just looked like himself. But Duo had still accused him of that dreadful thing.

Surely, _Trowa _had never felt like that? No, that was utterly ludicrous. Trowa loved him. And they'd kissed and it had felt so magical.

And Trowa had left him, taking off into the blue with the other pilot, whom neither of them even knew. Admittedly, he'd spoken to Quatre first, somehow sensing that the blond had felt the pain of Heero's self destruction and calling him out of it, telling him they had to leave. He'd made the snap decision to take Duo with him; 02 had felt so lost and alone and Quatre couldn't just leave him there, even though Rashid had been furious with him.

And now he was going to have to go back in there and find a way to apologise. He could do that. He would assure Duo that he had a -a - a _boyfriend - _and that he wasn't remotely interested in anyone else. Not that Duo wasn't attractive or anything, because he was, especially that mesmerising rope of hair, but…no, maybe he shouldn't say anything about Duo's charms.

It wasn't like he was attracted or anything. Just noticing that Duo was…good-looking didn't necessarily mean that he wanted to be with him. It was all very complicated.

'I am so very sorry,' he said formally, offering Duo a slight bow.

'Nah, I'm sorry,' Duo said quickly. 'I shouldn't have said any of that stuff. I - just - it's been a long day, you know? And you're being so nice to me and all.'

Quatre beamed. 'We should be friends, don't you think? After all, we're on the same side and we can help each other.'

'Yeah, I guess. Look, no offence or anything, but you're kinda emotional.'

'I am not!'

'Sure you're not.' Duo rolled his eyes, but he was grinning. 'Hey, you want to see something really cool?'

'Yes, please! What is it?'

Duo dug one hand into his pocket and held his hand out. 'Real seashells. I picked them up off a beach!'

'No!' Quatre took one of the tiny things, tracing the delicate shape. 'It's very beautiful. Actually, I think almost everything on this planet is beautiful.' He'd seen shells before; one of his sisters had collected them and Father had sent her specimens from Earth. It was very different to hold one in his hand though, than to see one in the glass-fronted cabinet in Samira's bedroom.

'Isn't it? I forget the name though. Did you know there are all different types of shell? Heero told me the names of them.'

'Oh!' Quatre bit his lip. 'I've never studied marine biology at all. Should I have? Do you think it's going to be important to know that sort of thing? Most of my training was for desert missions; I know nothing about the sea.'

Duo shrugged. 'Nah. Heero looked them up on his computer. He's got this laptop that he brings everywhere with him. And he knows all kinds of weird stuff. He's pretty weird himself, actually.'

'It was very brave, what he did. Self destructing like that.'

'It was stupid!' Duo snapped fiercely. 'He's stupid! He's got some sort of death wish. You should see the stuff I've seen him do; jumping out of windows and setting his own broken bones and God knows what. Honestly, I' m not sure if he's even human.'

'He was still brave.' Quatre said softly. 'Just to self-destruct like that. I don't know if I could do that.' He shivered, thinking back to what Trowa had said, just before they'd broken the comms link, had almost inferred that they should all do something like that.

'_It's time for us to make a choice. He made it clear for us.'_

He was sure he'd been mistaken though; Trowa wouldn't want to do that.

'You'd have more sense, probably,' Duo informed him. 'He's a lunatic. I mean, blowing himself up for the hell of it, that's so lame. How did that help anyone?'

'He didn't want to give up his Gundam, did he? And he didn't want the Colonies to suffer.'

Duo snorted; a rude little sound through his nose. 'He just wanted to kill himself. He's been trying to get himself killed since we met, and he'll probably be pissed off that he didn't do it. Probably be pissed off at your boyfriend for saving him.'

_Your boyfriend. _

That sounded so wonderful! And it was true. Trowa had asked him, that night in San Francisco, and then he'd brushed the softest kiss against Quatre's mouth, soft as a butterfly's whisper.

'You don't mind, do you, that I'm - that Trowa and I - are together? I know a lot of people think it's wrong.'

The other boy gave one of those characteristic shrugs, twisting that amazing braid around one wrist. 'It's no big deal on L2. Any of that.'

'It's a big deal on L4,' Quatre admitted sadly. It would have been amazing to grow up in a place where he would have been accepted. 'What about you? Is there someone you like?' he pressed, hoping Duo might decide to confide in him.

'I'm not interested in that stuff.' His mouth twisted. 'Heero's got a girlfriend. She's _really _annoying.'

'Has he really?' Honestly, these two were idiots! They were crazy about each other and Duo didn't even think that Heero liked him. Hmmm. In his next message to Trowa, he'd have to get his boyfriend to sound Heero out; maybe he actually thought that Duo didn't like him either. It was exactly like his sisters' romance novels, where the lovers were torn apart by some silly misunderstandings. They needed someone to help them. Well, he and Trowa would have to find some way to get them together; that was all.

'Yeah. You can keep that shell if you like,' Duo offered in one of his abrupt subject changes. He hadn't lied about the running and hiding anyway. 'I got more,. And you've been really great. You didn't have to bring me here or anything.' He slanted Quatre a sly little glance. 'Listen, Quat…uh, sorry, how do I say your name again?'

'Quatre.' He exaggerated all of his syllables, making Duo laugh. 'But you can just say 'Quat' if you like.'

'Quat. Right. I don't get why you're being so friendly to me.'

'Why shouldn't I be? We are friends. And after all, you've just given me a present from a real beach. Was it amazing?' There was a small artificial beach on L4 but of course, sand on Earth must be totally different.

Duo nodded, grinning. 'You've no idea how good sand feels when you're barefoot on it. It's so soft.' He dipped into his pocket and produced another shell. 'Heero found this one for me. It's called a conch. You're not really supposed to take them away from the sea, 'cause little crabs and stuff can live in them, but this one is a bit broken so we thought it wouldn't matter. Isn't it cool?'

'It's beautiful.' Quatre's fingers touched the little ridges of the spiral shell. 'You're so lucky! Did you swim? I'd love to swim in the real ocean! We have a swimming pool at home with artificial waves but I'm sure it's not nearly the same.'

'I don't like water,' Duo said flatly, some new emotion stirring. More fear and pain and some horrible memory that Quatre managed to squelch. Oh, Allah, there was such _darkness _there. 'I don't know how to swim anyway. I think Heero does; he can do bloody everything else, but there wasn't really time. We were trying to fix our Gundams - and yeah, I'll tell you about this terrible, rotten thing he did to me - and there was this rainbow and..'

'You actually saw a rainbow?' Quatre bounced on his chair. 'You're so lucky! I'd love to see a rainbow, but I've been mostly in the desert so far. What was it like?'

'Really pretty.' Duo smiled, presumably at the memory, his whole face lighting up. No wonder Heero had fallen in love with him, if he'd ever seen that smile. 'I don't even know how to describe it. Like this half circle of coloured lights against this really vivid blue sky. I wanted to take 'Scythe and look properly, but Heero said it was just an optical illusion, and it would have vanished by the time I got close enough.'

'It sounds like you spent rather a lot of time with him,' Quatre said, trying to sound casual. It also sounded like Duo remembered, verbatim, every utterance of Heero's.

'Nah, not really. I helped him break out of this hospital -well, that was kind of my fault 'cause I'd shot him - and get his Gundam back and everything, and the bastard stole parts out of my Deathscythe. And it was totally unnecessary. Howard - he's this friend of mine - had offered to help him out with repairs, and Heero just went straight ahead and helped himself to pieces of _my _Gundam. Can you believe that? I mean, the guy's a total prick.'

Quatre nodded gravely; he wasn't entirely sure what _prick _meant, but he could make a fairly good guess from the context.

'I'll tell you something else,' Duo continued, obviously bent on working himself into a fury. 'He didn't just rape 'Scythe; he took off on a mission without me. He never even bothered to say goodbye. Or thank me for helping me. Seriously, he thinks I'm this total loser who can't be trusted to do anything.' He looked sadly down at the little shells in his palm. 'I thought we were starting to get on, you know. He told me all sorts of cool stories about rainbows, and we looked for dolphins together.'

'Oh, I love all the rainbow legends!' Quatre enthused. It was easier for Duo to be angry with Heero than to admit he'd been scared to death he'd lost his friend; he could understand that, but 02's emotions were just so exhausting. 'Did you really see a dolphin? You're so lucky! I've only seen them in aquariums on L4.'

Duo shook his head. 'Heero said we were maybe too close too shore. We were on a ship tied up at the docks, and that they prefer the open sea, unless the weather is too stormy.'

'Still, it's something to look forward to, isn't it?' Quatre said positively. 'That would be marvellous; to see a real dolphin. I think it sounds like Heero likes you, really. If he told you all those stories, and gave you the shell and everything. Some people just aren't very good at talking about how they feel. Maybe he's shy?'

'Give me a break,' the long haired boy sniffed. 'He's not _shy_! You don't know anything about him. He only told me that stuff to show off and make me feel stupid.' His fingers closed around the conch shell and he shoved it back in his pocket. 'So, you came to Earth the same time as me, right? What sort of stuff have you seen?'

'Nothing so amazing as you have. I did see a flock of flamingos though. They actually landed on Sandrock. Can you believe that?'

'Um, no. I can't. What's a flamingo?'

'It's a type of wading bird. They have a really long neck and they're the most glorious shade of pink and they…'

'Pink?' Duo interjected slyly. 'Like your shirt? Hey, I'm just teasing, OK? Sit down. You are way, _way _too emotional for your own good.'

'I told you, I am not in the least emotional!' Quatre did his best to glare, but found he didn't really mind Duo laughing at him. It didn't feel malicious or mocking; it felt oddly nice.

It must be like this to have a real friend. He had Trowa, obviously, and that should be enough, but it would be lovely to have someone else to joke with and confide in. A friend as well as a lover, if that wasn't expecting too much.

If Duo ever decided to trust him, and actually be honest. But he'd have to be honest in turn and tell Duo about the empathy, and then Duo definitely wouldn't want to be his friend. No one ever did.

Maybe it was better if they both just kept pretending.


End file.
